Throughout my military career, I was married and we had problems from the get go. The marriage happened too early, we didn’t know each other very well, and I definitely didn’t know he was abusive. Many things went down in this marriage, and yes I am NOT with him anymore, but the one important thing I learned during this time was expectations. When one expects SO much from their partner, sibling, friend, and they do not get what they expected to get, they get upset.
Expectations have always been an enemy of mine, yet lately I have learned to try to control my expectations of others. Due to my OCPD, I won’t allow others to take over my responsibilities because of how I want them done. I have been trying to let that go and let others do things, the way they want to do them, as long as the task at hand is completed.
Bottom of the line, don’t over-expect anything from anyone. You will always be failed because you assume that your expectations will be met, yet their not. Don’t hassle your partner because you have too high expectations of them; lower you expectations and they will lower theirs. Things will start to turn around when high expectations are getting in the way.
Today’s post is short, but I have a future one coming that will be detailed and long about a past experience that has scarred me for life.